I guess its true once you reach the top there is only one place to go and its down…

The Early Years	The Pregnant Years	The Crazy Years

…Oh Britney, what happened to my beautiful, little sweet po’tator??? You had it all, the hits, the looks, the money, and then BOOM!!! You went nuts, and I mean literally NUTS!!! You are dating a bunch of loser douche bags, every time I see a picture of you that kooter of yours is blowing free in the wind, the pills, the booze, shaving your head, now your talking in a British accent.

A lot of people blame Kevin Federline for all of this and I totally disagree. Federline is a douche (I’m black, I’m white, I’m black, I’m white) pick a freakin’ race and stick with it already!!! Or how about this Sam Lufti character? Boy if there was a more of a jagoff Hollywood predator than this guy it would be Satan himself. Anyway I blame the downfall on a darker, sinister, and evil person for all of this on my little sweet po’tator. It was that evil slut known only by one name…Madonna!!!

Why Madonna you say? Think about it… After she appeared on the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards show and jammed her tongue down Britney’s mouth it has been a rough ride for Brit. It was the “Kiss of Death” for her career and life. You have to figure that tongue has been in some pretty scary places and had the pee pee’s of the likes of Dennis Rodman, Jose Canseco, Tony Ward, Sandra Bernhard ( I still say she is a dude), and (oh dear god!) Rosie O’Donnell’s giant koochie in that mouth.

The "Kiss of Death" - Check out Madonna's ears you can tell those have been pulled out quite a few times

I laugh when people say that was just the way Madonna was passing the torch to Britney. It was really one of Satan’s minion was sucking all the life (and for all intense and purpose the common sense) out of Britney. This is a bitch (Madonna) that actually had her 350 lb. bodyguards chase all of the little kids out of a playground so her daughter could ride the swings. She can’t stand the fact that someone could possibly out sell her and become more popular than she ever was. Didn’t she basically steal a little kid from some third world African country?

Papa Don’t Preach, I’m a skanky bitch,
Papa don’t preach, I ain’t losing sleep,
cause I’m stealing that little African baby,
yeah I’m stealing that baby…

So Britney please get well and cover up your kooter for the love of Judas Priest, that thing looks beatin’ like Amy Winehouse after an all night herion binge.